09/02/14 10:51am
green-wood cemetery clown

Yeah wait…what was the deal with this feaking clown?

We here at Brokelyn are sadly aware that Summer ’14 ended in spirit yesterday, on Labor Day. This year’s summer was known for two things: the temperate weather which we’re sure we’ll pay for with a winter hellscape, and the mysteries surrounding a group of events which have captivated us all of Brooklyn, probably.

The biggest mystery Brooklyn was scratching its head over this summer was the pair of white flags sitting atop the Brooklyn Bridge, put there in place of the American flags that adorned the top of one of the most beautiful structures in America. We’re not fans of freelance decoration of the Brooklyn Bridge in general here, but we have to admit, there was something sort of interesting about those flags. Who put them there, and why? Random jokes on Twitter claiming responsibility for the flags were also met with an outsized reaction by the authorities who were clearly frustrated with the lack of information they were able to unearth themselves. We had a bonafide caper on our hands.

Then we found out some German artists did it, and after we got over our relief that there wasn’t some sinister reason for the flags being put there, we settled in with the disappointing fact that it was some silly art thing. Anyway, we’re not getting burned by a mystery’s uninteresting resolution again. We already saw the last season of LOST. But hey, that was only one of the many mysteries swirling around our fair borough. We still have others, and we want answers. Interesting answers. (more…)

07/10/14 4:23pm

Just another unemployed dude with a bucket on his head now

The NBA off-season has been one of massive palace intrigue from the day after the Heat were blown out by the Spurs, and the Nets have not been short of said intrigue. They’re not in the LeBron sweepstakes, but the Jason Kidd clusterfuck and the question of whether Paul Pierce and KG will come back has created plenty of instability on its own. Thankfully though, the Nets have made a positive, stabilizing move. No, not hiring Lionell Hollins to coach the team. They’ve officially ended the reign of hilariously bad mascot the BrooklyKnight. Mikhail Prokohorov does realize his salary doesn’t count towards the luxury tax though, right? (more…)

04/12/13 2:20pm
Science, bitches. Via ZNN Online.

Science, bitches. Via ZNN Online.

So obviously there are plenty of places to cavort around Brooklyn, but what about the children? Ah yes, the children of Brooklyn. While us 20-somethings are running about acting like drunk babies, apparently there are actual babies in this borough too (some drunk, some not), and they need something to do, dammit. And that’s why the BrooklynKnight, the Nets’ official superhero, is visiting the Brooklyn Children’s Museum this Sunday at 1:30. (more…)

11/15/12 11:00am

The Nets will get out from under Joe Johnson’s contract one day, but you can remember him forever. via That’s Enuff

The Nets have the first winning streak that Brooklyn has seen in over half a century, but never mind that, they’re also engaging in a pandering display that would even embarrass James Dolan giving back to their fans. Today at 6:30pm, anyone who lines up at the Barclays Center will be able to get a free tattoo of the Nets logo. (more…)

11/06/12 3:03pm

Yeah, but how’s his perimeter defense? via Bleeding Cool

So, the Nets have a mascot, and the deep-sea diver Tron reject you see above is supposed to be it. Hey, no, great job. Good mascot. I understand that my views on the Nets are not shared by everyone else on Brokelyn’s staff, much less by the entire population of the borough. And my previous thoughts on the Islanders weren’t shouted from the rooftops. But as someone who’s thrown away entire evenings in his 20s to watch sports or read comics I feel uniquely qualified to say that the BrooklyKnight is horrible and that the sooner the team introduces some Punisher knockoff (decked in blue and orange, naturally) to tragically shoot him in the back, the better. (more…)