This is not a neighborhood!
There comes a time when you have to stand up for yourself. When you have to push back against forces larger than you and say, “Enough! This aggression will not stand, man.” Unless you actually have an army, you have to pick and choose where and when you’ll fight these battles. But today, we’re throwing down the gauntlet, drawing a line in the sand and getting the knives out: RAMBO is not a freaking neighborhood.
Curbed brings us news that the unfortunately-named patch of DUMBO has now appeared on GoogleMaps, which lends it a veneer of official endorsement and possible entrance into Wikipedia, arbiter of all knowledge. RAMBO is allegedly a tiny kinda rectangle thing boxed in between BQE, Nassau Street, Tillary Street and the Manhattan Bridge overpass.
See how stupid this looks?
It stands for “Right Around the Manhatan Bridge Overpass” which is so different from a place that’s “Down Under the Manhattan Bridge Overpass” that apparently you need to slice it out with a scalpel.
It’s one thing when Brokelandia is playing up realtors’ penchant for ridiculous “new” neighborhoods, and yeah, sure, DUMBO is itself a made up term. But, it’s not as if DUMBO is so big that it needs to be split up. Let this happen and the next thing you know, “Barackabilly” will be a real place. Email Google, call your state senator, petition UN Secretary General Ban Ki-Moon, write to Sly himself and do whatever you can to make sure Brooklyn remains RAMBO-free.
Ban-Ki-Moon is also a new neighborhood, right next to Boutros Boutros-Heights
from now on, Ft green between Fulton, Atlantic, Flatbush and Vanderbilt is now “[South] Portland Heights”
I think RAMBO + Brooklyn should be a good target for a googlebombing. or at least some pejorative tweeting, like “I have a new dealer now but the stuff I got from the guy in RAMBO was always cut with Levasimole” or “RAMBO is a great neighborhood for teenagers with absentee parents and poor impulse control”
Down Under Manhattan Bridge, Northern Annexed Market Exurb
Round Or Approaching Crown Heights
Front Upper Peninsula Area
I really prefer Yonkers On Lake Ontario.
I live in that area and it is a pain in the arse to answer, “Where in brooklyn do you live?”… Uh kinda DUMBO, but not under the bridge, eh Ft Greene/Navy Yard but not really, Downtown BK but that isn’t residential. RAMBO sounds stooopid though. Woe is me!
I just say EFF BUSH AND HILLARY
Girl, that’s when you give cross streets.
so If i google GHETTO; I’m sure my “sectioned-off “side of brooklyn would come up