So hey, remember about two months ago when everyone was freaking out and rending their garments over the “average NYC rent over $3,000 now” thing? Well, good news everyone! It’s only getting worse, with a new Douglas Elliman report letting us know that the median rent in Brooklyn is the highest it’s been in five years. Great, good news, cool stuff everyone, let’s have a party. A party with a lot of crying.
The report, published this morning, found that the median rent in Brooklyn was $2,850 in August, up from $2,675 last month, when we were so young and the world seemed so full of possibilities. Well, screw that noise, our eyes are open now and our open eyes are seeing a world full of Dumpster homes and micro-neighborhoods sliced up smaller and smaller so as to wring the most money possible out of them.
Median rent for studios, one-bedrooms and three-bedrooms all went up, and despite the fact that the price for two-bedroom apartments fell, the report notes that they’ve leapt up an astounding thirty fucking percent since last August (swearing not in report). And even better, despite the cries of “New housing will fix all of this because the market,” this report noted there were 554 new rentals on the market, an almost 200% increase since last year, but prices still are stratospheric. Huh, it’s almost like no one is interested in building affordable units without being forced to. If someone has a way to fix this, great, let us know. We’ll just be at the bar, drinking well whiskey at 10am, because who cares.