Love trivia and 16 other free ways to enjoy the week

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Sadly for you, they’re not going to tell you this at Love Actually trivia if you get the answer wrong

1. Going to be a parent one day? Go to this seminar on financial planning for new parents to learn why that’s a TERRIBLE idea (Monday)

2. Help plan the future of the Gowanus before some clown can dub it the next next Williamsburg (Monday)

3. Take a chunk out of another brick of the patriarchy by going to a release party for a queer-themed zine (Monday)

4. It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas/comedy shows are having their Christmas-themed shows, like Cubesmas at Muchmore’s. What, you expected Tin Pan Alley? (Monday)

5. Get a head start on your oddly specific New Year’s resolution to “Be more literary locally” by attending the last Franklin Park Reading Series of the year (Monday)

6. The Society for the Advancement of Social Studies is getting together to talk about the history of really big things, like that big thing you carry around in your pants. You know, that magical extending ruler that’s 11-feet long (Tuesday)

7. Learn how filmmakers manipulate us emotionally, using our own neurons in our brains against us, and then rise up and destroy those filmmakers! (Tuesday)

8. The Secret Science Club is also meeting, to talk about particles with astrophysicist Ray Jayawardhana. Get drunk and ask him how scientifically accurate “Particle Man” is (Tuesday)

9. Just because it’s Christmas time, it doesn’t mean you don’t have to stop being a snarky miser, and you can meet people just like you at the release party for the Coloring for Grown-Ups Holiday Fun Book (Wednesday)

10. Love Actually trivia at the Trash Bar will be 11 different intersecting trivia games happening one after the other. No, just kidding, can you imagine how annoying that would be? (Wednesday)

11. Andy Ricker of Pok Pok fame will be talking about his new book at BookCourt, but it’s about Thai food, not the joy that seeing people wait for tables brings him like you think it’d be (Wednesday)

12. You get three plays for the price of none at Griots’ INK, because all of the plays you get to see are free. Aren’t you a lucky boy (Thursday)

13. Or instead of seeing other people’s work, finally bring that surprisingly light-hearted and romance-filled reboot of the Mortal Kombat series to Launchpad for a table read around other writers (Thursday)

14. Get a depressing, left-leaning history lesson by seeing an episode of Oliver Stone’s Untold History of the United States, which then paradoxically becomes the told history of the United States (Thursday)

15. The last Bug Gulp comedy show of the year is extra-fitting, seeing as how these are the final days of Mayor Smaug Bloomberg (Friday)

16. If you’ve ever wanted to see Emmet Otter’s jug band brought to glorious/horrible life, this Salt Cracker Crazies show devoted to covering them is about as close as you’re gonna get (Friday)

17. Videology is celebrating their tenth birthday, and if there’s any store out there deserving of celebrating ten years of existence, it’s a local video rental store (Friday)