Hello, good morning, if you wouldn’t mind peeking over your coffee for a second so we can ask you a question: If you are not registered to vote yet, WHAT THE ACTUAL HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?? You have but two days left to register before the Oct. 12 deadline, and you can do it online now in New York state, which means you can be an active member of this democracy for all the effort of navigating a batch of Buzzfeed gifs. Get on it, or Big Bird’s blood is on your hands.
This week is also, of course, the showdown of Handsome Joe Biden and Paul “Ragin’” Ryan in the vice presidential debate: you can stream it for free online or find a place to watch Thursday’s event in this list of debate viewing parties in Brooklyn (you can use this drinking game too if you just swap the names out); we’ll add a bonus event below from our friends at Full Circle Bar too. And if after all this, you’re still not interested in politics, please return to blissfully clicking your cat gifs.
Full Circle Bar is throwing a “Canpaign” event, where $25 gets you a Super 6 PAC of American craft beers in cans. You can also vote for the best CANdidate (you see what they’re going for here?), the winner of which will be announced on election day. For the VP debate tomorrow, the super 6 PAC beers are:
Avery Joe’s Pilsner
Bluepoint Toasted Lager
Flying Dog UnderDog Lager
Six Point Crisp
Sly Fox Pikeland Pils
Also, if you want to have free Pizza Hut/endless diarrhea for the rest of your life, Pizza Hut is doing this terrible thing, so get yourself up to Hofstra for the Oct. 16 debate. But another chain has already decided the election, so why bother?