Happy Tax Day! Here are a few freebies to help deal with paying up

No free stuff for these guys!

No free stuff for these guys!

Well, kids, April 15th is almost done! Or, at the very least, it’s very nearly  a reasonable time to crack open that bottle of Jim Beam you bought with what little money the government left you with. Luckily, though we’re all desperately hoping the IRS might not find a daily bodega coffees a suspicious deduction, there are a bunch of warm-blooded American companies out there willing to dole out freebies even to the self-employed. Take a look, and let us know of any other gratis goodies out there today in the comments:

AMC Theaters: This deal actually kicked off on Friday, but through the end of today you can still score a free small popcorn, assuming you’re willing to drop $14 on Scary Movie 5.

Cinnabon: As has been the deal for the past couple of years, Cinnabon‘s giving out two free Cinnamon Bites as part of their “Tax Day Bites” promotion, though keep in mind that a gym membership will still cost you (maybe).

Office Depot: For the frugal (and, since it’s already April 15th, procrastinate) taxpayer, Office Depot’s offering free black-and-white copies of your tax return. You get 25 pages, which gives you 25 TOTALLY FREE opportunities to be reminded that your return will cover maybe half your rent next month, and that you will never make enough money to buy one of those fancy lattes with foam in the shape of a leaf.

7-Eleven: Through April 30th, you can get a free medium Slurpee if you text Slurp7 to 711711. As long as you don’t mind contributing to the downfall of human society, that is.

Pinkberry: Frozen yogurt’s answer to the crack epidemic is giving away free Pinkberry Greeks every Wednesday this month, including on, well, Wednesday. Stop by between 11 a.m. and 2 p.m. to snag one, assuming you survive the ensuing swarm of rabid, active bacteria-eating souls.

Huckleberry Bar: This isn’t strictly a Tax Day event, but if you’re feeling nostalgic for a time before you heard of a 1099, Huckleberry Bar in Williamsburg is screening The Incredibles at 9 p.m. for free. Let Brad Bird and co. wash that H&R Block muck away.