East Bushwick, coming to a real estate agency near you

Say hello to East Bushwick

Say hello to East Bushwick

Realtors have already made East Williamsburg — which, according to Craigslist, could stretch anywhere from the Graham L stop to the farthest corners of Bed-Stuy — into such a little monster the whole ‘hood’s about ready to break off from its Bedford Ave brothers and rule Brooklyn from its DuckDuck throne. But if you thought at least some of Bushwick was safe from this real estate madness, think again: developers say they think Brooklyn’s new hot nabe will be happening off the Halsey L stop, and they’re selling off major pockets of land to turn into fancy new homes and apartments for a new wave of gentrifiers.

The Morgan and Jefferson Ave L stops are already pretty Brooklyn and Hana Natural-ed out, so residential developers are ready to move the hip factor elsewhere. “It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to see that this is moving further south,” Michael Amirkhanian, the sales director at a development company currently scoping out Halsey, told the Commercial Observer. There’s already a development site at 386 Weirfield Street on sale for $8.5 million, plus a huge new-ish development at 550 Irving Ave (complete with a swimming pool, gym, sauna and jacuzzi, clearly all the amenities Bushwick’s known for) has somehow been successful, so we can probably expect to see more of these projects popping up farther and farther down the L in the future.

And, of course, once East Bushwick gets its very own incarnation of Roberta’s, or, at the very least, a Northeast Kingdom, all those New School and NYU juniors who heard it was cool to live off the L will start flocking, the Times will start calling Halsey the new Bedford/Morgan/Broadway Junction/whatever. In short, what we’re trying to tell you is that “North Bushwick” is already over, and it’s only a matter of time before we start seeing an influx of upscale Salvation Armys, Bugaboo strollers and shopping malls, so you might as well just give up and move to Manhattan.

[h/t Commercial Observer]

13 Comment

  • I look forward to telling an entirely new group of over-privileged, over-educated and under-real-worlded folk to kindly go fuck themselves for ruining yet another neighborhood.

    • I agree Nick, it’s a scandal and a tragedy that our young people aren’t watching The Real World anymore. Something must be done.

  • Next thing you know hipsters will be moving into “East New York.” Whaddaworld.

    • i don’t know if my parents count as hipsters, but east new york was the first place they lived in new york. you know, they also lived in east elmhurst and eventually settled in eastchester (the suburb, not the bronx).

      anyway, i wanna know when this set up resets and we’re all forced to live in lower manhattan again.

  • Been living off Halsey for 10 years and my rent’s gone up 80% while stupider and stupider rich kids have moved in. You know what I’m hoping for? A nice crime spree, a couple of nasty fires and a couple of said cute young NYUers going home in body bags because they wouldn’t give up their iPhone. Then I want that news promoted heavily. That would do nicely thank you. Also a swift kick in the face for any real estate agent trying to get away with $2.50/ft^2 in my hood. Also, I’m gonna sneak in and crap in your jacuzzi, and so will 50 of my OG Bushwick friends. That is all.

    • ah yes, the old murder spree in order to get your rent down. that is always nice. until you’re the one murdered.

      why not just move to a cheaper neighborhood? it’s not like you grew up by halsey street.

      • Nah…. I’ll take my chances with the murdering. Anyone who can’t take it shouldn’t be living there. You show me a neighborhood with ready cross-town subway access, large undeveloped industrial buildings and an underwhelming “cool” factor, lack of hip expensive nonsense, and dirt cheap rent and I’m there… I’ve looked but no dice.

  • I’ve only been living in this city for a measly 3 years, but I can’t afford bed stuy anymore, now that we finally have a grocery store that doesn’t stink of mothballs. Yet, we still have to order our beers outside bullet proof windows and suffer long waits for the G train. How does this justify $2000+ for a 2 bedroom?

    Will probably move to Lefferts Garden or Kensington, much to my Bushwick friends’ horror.

  • Stop ruining Brooklyn, please. The attitude from these condescending people is that they will help the savages but most are racist separatist. They don’t want indigenous of Brooklyn in their new establishments, they don’t care about the people nor culture that was there before. They refuse to merge with the previous people of the land and work with them to build a better neighborhood that incorpprates everyone. What is going on is a form of modern day imperialism. I am rather sick of it. Brooklyn has had white people but those whites when I talk to them don’t even want the newbies. They are bringing a new homeless and they selfishly don’t care about them, the homeless that reflects them and was caused by refusal to research and call 311. With the voice of the Amityville ghost I say “Get Out”

    • There are no “indigenous” Brooklynites, unless some of the Lenape or Mohawk or Canarsie are still around, somewhere. Before the Great Migration and White Flight, Brooklyn was full of white folks. Just walk down the Snyder Avenue border of Holy Cross Cemetery and read the surnames on the gravestones. Not that Irish and Italian folks were always thought of as “white enough.” Now, while many of those neighborhoods those white people fled to get away from the influx of black folks are now full of said black and other brown folks, it doesn’t make the current residents “indigenous”.

    • Colonialism at its finest.