Don’t tie your fucking garbage to the Brooklyn Bridge you damn animals

love trash

What the fuck is this shit. Photo by Jen Jones, via Women You Should Know

Why people decided they wanted to mar the beauty of the Brooklyn Bridge with a bunch of Master Locks and turn this landmark into a row of middle school lockers we will never know, but now that people seem to have gotten the message not to do that, they’ve replaced it with something even worse.

Jen Jones of Women You Should Know noticed that now people are tying garbage to the bridge. People are tying their fucking garbage to the national treasure that is the Brooklyn Bridge to symbolize their love or their trip there or some other bullshit reason that idiotic bullshit people think of. Knock it off. Knock if the fuck off RIGHT NOW.

Jones said she first noticed the love trash while walking across the Brooklyn Bridge and enjoying the lack of love locks ruining the view. That is, until she noticed a cluster of D.O.T. workers having to untie and remove “ragged ribbons, toilet paper, plastic bags, paper receipts, and ear buds.” Needless to say, she was horrified and bummed to realize that people thought TYING GARBAGE TO IT was a great way to improve one of the most iconic pieces of architecture on the Eastern Seaboard.

Leave your tourist money at home if it also means showing up and defiling the Brooklyn Bridge. Go somewhere else, or better yet, stay home forever and build a garbage monument to yourself because you’re a worthless garbage person for doing this. We consider ourselves to be liberals, but we would vote for someone who suggested the death penalty for being caught doing this in a second. Fuck you, you garbage people. Fuck you straight to Hell.

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2 Comment

  • I hate to say it, but I can see more local people doing this than tourists. I have witnessed a local woman telling her daughter to kick her empty Cheetos bag under the bus they were boarding, and another local woman setting her empty Sprite can on an outside ledge of the main USPS at 34th Street. Apparently throwing my hands up, asking them “What the hell?!,” doesn’t do anything. Then again I’m also a short girl who is looking to get through life without being stabbed so my confrontational level with people twice my size doesn’t typically exceed asking the pieces-of-shit the obvious question mentioned above.

    Locals or tourists, I say throw the culprits in the Chokey with people who steal credit card information!

  • Maybe it was the Brooklyn Bridge itself that raised the white flag.