Do the menorah horah, and 21 more ways to have a bright weekend

The Schlep Sisters will light allll your candles (#13) (pic by Ben Trivett)

The Schlep Sisters will light allll your candles (#13) (pic by Ben Trivett)

1. Geek out at a night of Nerd Nite lectures: topics include supervillains, celebrity scandals from the ’20s, and sci-fi’s killer ladies. (Friday, $10)

2. Get funky with the Brooklyn Ballet’s Nutcracker Sweet!, a thoroughly modern take that includes LED-spangled tutus made by NYCResistor, hip-hop and Middle Eastern dance choreography, and projections of vintage Brooklyn. (Friday through Sunday, $25)

3. Go hybrid at the Bushwick Starr’s 5th annual Puppets & Poets Festival, co-produced with Alphabet Arts. (Friday through Sunday, $18)

4. Laugh along with everyone’s favorite live nighttime talk show, Late Night Basement, with guests Alex Ross Perry, Sean Patton, and Gary Vider. (Friday, FREE)

5. Or get tragic at LoftOpera’s rendition of Rape of Lucretia. (Friday & Saturday, $30)

6. Or get mad with F*ck That Movie, where Phoebe Robinson, Zach Broussard, Brandon Scott Jones, and Megan Gailey will tell you about their most loathed films. (Friday, $5)

7. If you want to go shopping, there’s a crazy number of holiday markets this weekend, at Secret Project Robot, Roberta’s, Arts & Letters, Silent Barn, Threes Brewing, The Ark, and Morbid Anatomy’s at the Bell House—just to name a few. (Saturday & Sunday, FREE)

8. Enjoy this preposterously warm weather with the Brooklyn Bike Crew’s 15-mile Whiskey Ride. (Saturday, FREE)

9. Show off your culinary chops at Arrogant Swine, where Umi & Joios present the Holiday Home Cooking Taste-Off. (Saturday, $6)

10. Watch illustrators get competitive at Invisible Dog’s Battle of Drawing, which includes free cookies for the audience. (Saturday, FREE)

11. Get messy at Aviv with Stairwell Theater’s immersive Ubu Rex, which they’re describing as a “post-apocalyptic cabaret dinner party.” (Saturday & Sunday, $7–$25)

12. See some art you will definitely recognize from Brooklyn murals, but in a book! Buff Monster will be at Cotton Candy Machine to release his new tome, Stay Melty, with FREE Sailor Jerry rum too! (Saturday, FREE)

13. Hold on to your latkes: the Schlep Sisters present the 9th annual Menorah Horah, with burlesque and comedy from Darlinda Just Darlinda, Varla Velour, the Maine Attraction, and many more. (Saturday, $20)

14. Get brassy at Industry City Distillery for PitchBlak Brass Band’s 5-year anniversary show: Five Years of Fire. (Saturday, $12)

15. Laugh your face off at the Stand & Deliver 2nd anniversary: Night of Too Many Great Comics at Freddy’s Bar. (Saturday, FREE)

16. Use the Force to concentrate on watching all six Star Wars movies in a single night at the Gemini and Scorpio loft. Recharge your energy by marveling at people’s costumes and sipping on “galaxy far away”–themed drinks. (Saturday, $10)

17. Turn the tables and have Santa sit on your lap at Grumpy Bert, where Santa Remy Claus (he’s a dog, it’s okay!) will sit for a portrait with you. (Sunday, FREE)

18. Isn’t it great that we live in the time of the mashup? Today the Beerded Ladies present Short Stacks & Stouts, a pancake-and-beer pairing party at Covenhoven. (Sunday, FREE)

19. See how it all crumbles at the Brooklyn Cookie Takedown at Royal Palms. (Sunday, $20)

20. Hear something different: the Brooklyn Symphony Orchestra highlights unusual instruments with works featuring penny-whistles, gourds, claves, and more. (Sunday, $20)

21. Boogie your heart out at No Parking on the Dance Floor, in a new spot at La Luz. (Sunday, $8)

22. Go flipping nuts at the Muse December Circus Cabaret, with live music and performances from a dozen acrobats. (Sunday, $10)

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