Manspread. It’s rude and not really defensible, considering, as we’ve gone over, it’s a selfish use of limited public space that is not your living room. So finally the MTA is reminding people, “Hey, don’t do that, it’s rude.” This is apparently a bridge too far for the Daily News editorial board, who parachuted into the debate and barfed a totally unnecessary “Actually!” into the conversation with their “Confessions of a manspreader.” Actually guys, manspreading is both not bad and just can’t be helped.
The manspreader of the News‘ editorial board is mad, furious even. All because people make fun of the ridiculous way he feels entitled to a subway seat. Or seats, as it usually is. He can’t help it though! Just ask him:
I pay my fare. I get on the subway. There’s an empty seat. I grab it. I extend my legs, knees splayed. They go far and wide. And for this I’m held up to ridicule?
Just because of how I’m built. Am I not human?
A truly devastating use of the one-line argument in the editorial rhetoric bag of tricks. No wait, we mean totally fucking laughable. Guys don’t have a biological requirement to take up two seats. Your balls won’t explode. Nothing will happen if you just take one seat. Hell, maybe someone will even give you a medal for being so courteous, since apparently dudes need a goddamn gold star for not being jerks.