This isn’t your mother’s grand piano. via Craigslist
Holiday party season is upon us. Between Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas and all those Jewish ones, competition runs especially high for house parties this time of year. So if you’re planning on entertaining guests in your derelict Brooklyn abode this holiday season then you’d better be making it look classy as all fuck.
Don’t know where to look for that next-level party decor? Here’s a start: someone in Williamsburg is giving away a grand piano that’s been gutted and refinished to hold beer. (more…)
Brooklyn Boys, coming soon to an office near you. Photos by Spencer Starnes
In the year 2016, the photo calendar is little more than a relic of the bygone Hallmark era. Dethroned from its organizational dominion by basic e-planning technology circa 1984, and later eschewed for the more minimalist Moleskine, the photo calendar now hovers, in terms of status, somewhere in between the tea cosy and the blu-ray DVD. It’s usually just cute dog and cat calendars that make up the bulk of the stock. And sure, FDNY’s female firefighters recently got their own photo calendar, but that was more of a win for feminism than anything else.
That all said, there’s a new photo calendar coming to town. This town, specifically. And it features never-before-seen pictures of one of the most elusive species of all: Brooklyn boys.
The calendar is the brainchild of a professional photographer in BK, Spencer Starnes, who told Brokelyn he first stumbled onto the idea by accident.
“I shot the first photo as a test shoot with my roommate in November,” Starnes, 25, said. “I [was trying] to do fashion photography and I didn’t like it, but I enjoyed the style of lighting. And I thought it would be really fun to put it into a calendar.”
With a name like “Brooklyn Boys,” normally we’d just roll our eyes and move on, but this calendar isn’t going for the same low-hanging fruit of Brooklyn stereotypes as most. You won’t see these Brooklyn boys fixing bicycles, for example, or combing their cascading beards with tortoiseshell utensils. Instead, you’ll see them crouched naked on their coffee tables playing video games, or surrounded by mounds of Texas paraphernalia. It’ll either delight you or infuriate you. (more…)
Since the dawn of time, men have been spreading in order to evolve
Nothing kills your commute like seeing someone taking up more space than they ought to be on a crowded train. With more than 4 million straphangers relying on public transit every day, the idea of someone spreading out over multiple seats isn’t just irksome; it’s downright unacceptable. And the worst of all these spatial offenders, more loathsome than big bag carriers and seat-sleepers, is undoubtedly the manspreader.
Despite the manspreader’s shame in the public eye, there are two journalists (Ash Bennington and Mark Skinner) making a curious case defending the manspreader, claiming that there’s actual evolutionary reasoning behind the spread. Really? (more…)
Crews was being interviewed about his upcoming role in a Western flick, Adam Sandler’s already controversial and hated The Ridiculous Six. So naturally, the TODAY Show brought in a live horse for Crews to ride. And for some reason, that horse just happened to be Tonka, the same horse we were all seeing ride through Crown Heights this past summer. Crews was thrilled. He fed it a carrot. The bond was made; these guys are buds now.
Needless to say, we’re pretty jealous of that horse. (more…)
[UPDATE: We bring you an important update to this very important story. Vice music editor Dan Ozzi has outed himself as the mysterious seller of the bag of air, detailed in his post about his goofy scheme here. According to Ozzi, after eBay pulled the bag off of its listings, he got in touch with with an eBay representative who wouldn’t give him any information on why the auction was pulled, and he warned Ozzi off of making a new account:
I needed the money, I pleaded with RJ. Some friends from my luxury condo and I were planning on pooling our cash and opening a DIY venue. Could I just start a new account and relist the item? “I don’t encourage you to open a new account because we will still be able to know that it’s you,” he warned me.
How much of this is real? Honestly who knows, this is the world we live in now, a nightmare panopticon of irony where nothing is real except the things that are but you’ll never find out which is which. This is why the internet comes from the garbage now. Anyway, if you still want to buy the bag of Williamsburg air for $20,000, you can email Ozzi.]
Hey guys, so here’s something. Somebody bagged up some air in Williamsburg and is selling it on eBay for $20,000. The bidding started a few days ago at $40, but ongoing bidding wars have brought the price up to five digits. (more…)
Need we say more than “Off The Grid But Still Stealing Cable Stout?” Via SB Nation.
Ah, craft beer, the poor man’s drink Olympics. With over 4,500 craft breweries scattered around the country—and that’s just the ones with wholesale accounts—it’s hard to imagine why USA Today’s blog For the Win said they were “attempting to determine which of the [craft] breweries in America is the greatest.” By user voting, no less. Just this morning, they posted a new bracket showing they’d narrowed it down to sixteen breweries. Hey, feel free to cast your vote, but we’ve had enough of the beeriarchy. In fact, we much prefer this absurd beer bracket by Jon Bois and Spencer Hall over at SB Nation, which pits beers like “Reddist Sexist Upvote Dog Porter” against “Something about a Fucking Ship.” (more…)
The years may have passed, but these girls will never stop being CrazySexyCool
You might remember them as the powerful R&B lady trio that brought you “No Scrubs” and “Unpretty.” Or you might just know T-Boz and Chilli from their endearingly irrelevant talent-seeking TV series R U the Girl. But whatever your degree of familiarity with the powerhouse Grammy-band TLC, you’ll be pleasantly surprised to hear that they’re on the rise again—kind of. As it turns out, the band is having to use a crowd-funding campaign to garner funding for their next move.
Dumb and Dumber might be on your radar for a couple reasons at the moment. For one, there’s that sequel, which we will henceforth never mention again. Also, it’s a comedy classic so you probably think of it more than you’d admit in public. Here’s another reason to be thinking of the movie right now: tonight at the Trash Bar, you can see a band that’s devoted themselves to only playing covers off the Dumb and Dumber soundtrack. Bring your new age girl, she’ll like it. She’ll like it a lot. (more…)
No, see, it’s not an illegal sublet. We just have a lot of kids.
Your desire to live in a luxury apartment is probably a bit stymied by the fact that your desire to pay a luxury apartment price is non-existent. What if though, you could split the cost of it with a few roommates? Taking it a step further, what if you split the cost with 21 other roommates and you all slept in bunk beds? Sure the arrangement probably wouldn’t be strictly legal, but that’s just what a broker is offering in this YouTube video. Pros: Luxury living! You get kitchen utensils! Cons: No drinking. No drugs. Only two bathrooms. You have to sleep in a bunk bed. You might get kicked out for living in an illegally subdivided luxury apartment that’s making one person rich while helping throw off the housing market.