01/16/15 11:18am
sex toy bingo

Finally, bingo that speaks to your needs

Bingo, for all of its many charms, isn’t really seen as a very sexy thing to do if you’re looking to go out and have a good time. Which we understand, since so much of it involves listening closely to people calmly calling out letter-number combos and then hunting around to see if you got it. A bingo game coming to Williamsburg next Tuesday is ditching the retiree air attached to it though, because in this particular game of bingo, you’ll be competing for sex toys. (more…)

01/14/15 11:00am
asslands

We hope you’re ready

Ah, the ass. It’s kind of having a moment, whether it’s the “Anaconda” video or the “Booty” video or someone shoving their face in Allison Williams’ butthole or your racist uncle making references to twerking. And hey, why not, asses are great. If you agree (and we don’t see why you wouldn’t), we’ve got great news for you: the same people behind the Robyn dance parties (R.I.P.) are having a dance party celebrating all things ass. Better get your booty in shape quick. (more…)

01/09/15 11:01am
turkey's nest

We will live if these cost a dollar or two more. via Flickr user Meghan and Cyrus

We all knew that there would be some consequences after the city announced that styrofoam containers were no longer welcome around here. Turns out that one of those consequences is gonna be prices going up for the giant margaritas at the Turkey’s Nest, with bar owner Steve Ehrseman telling DNA Info that he’ll have to raise prices on the drinks to cover the cost of non-styrofoam cups. To their credit though, drinkers at the Turkey’s Nest didn’t freak out about the news, and neither should anyone else. You wanna do some good in the world, sometimes that’s hard. (more…)

12/29/14 3:40pm
The color's already fading from our memories

The color’s already fading rapidly from our memories. via Facebook

The rent in Williamsburg has been making us more nervous than ever for the neighborhood’s cool spots, and Time Out New York reports our worry is well-founded. The owners of Trash Bar have announced that Williamsburg prices are as dive bar/venue combo unfriendly as you’d imagine and they’re expecting to close soon. (more…)

12/29/14 11:14am
Look at these fucking hipsters

Look at these fucking hipsters

“Bring back the old New York!” grumbles everyone unsatisfied with the Taylor Swift(boat)-ing of the city, from the most jaded one-eyed bartender to the wettest behind the ears newbie who honestly probably shouldn’t be saying that. The crumbling infrastructure, the threat of bankruptcy everywhere, Ed Koch personally asking “How’m I doin’?” while fending off rumors about his sexuality. And of course, the crime.

Well, we can’t bring back all of it, least of all Ed Koch, but New Williamsburg got a taste of the Old Williamsburg this weekend, as Mob Wives human London Rene was stabbed at Output, according to TMZ. Yep, the era of TMZ reporting on Williamsburg has begun! (more…)

12/26/14 11:10am
williamsburg diner

Future condos. via Flickr user Joseph

So, get your fill of hope and joy and goodwill towards man on Christmas and now you’re looking to be a terrible grump talking about missing “the old New York” again? Great, have we got a story for you. The old-school diner building on Wythe Avenue and North 3rd Street in Williamsburg is being torn down to make way for some condos according to Brownstoner. “Oh god,” you huff, “just more proof that this is a shit, garbage tire fire of a year.” There’s still a diner in Williamsburg, that serves actual diner food though! (more…)

12/11/14 11:00am
If you come at the Kings County, you better now miss.

You come at the Kings County, you best not miss.

Years ago while working at Trader Joe’s, I saw my friend D get in a tiff with another girl, both of them native Brooklynites. After the fight, D walked over to me and said, “That girl must be from Williamsburg or something because she is HARD.”  She was of course speaking of the historical Williamsburg, once known as a rough-and-raw high-crime area, not so much the home of jokes about skinny jeans and PBR it had become. Of course, even in the years since that tiff, the fear in the neighborhood has changed: people don’t worry so much about being mugged, or being plowed under by a penny farthing, they worry that they’ve accidentally wandered into Midtown East, thanks to the chain-washing of Jay Crew, Urbo Outties, Hole Foods, Starsbuck and now an off-brand Microsoft store.

We can only guess it is this latest iteration that most terrifies Brooklyn native Michael K. Williams, who played Omar on The Wire, Albert “Chalky” White on Boardwalk Empire and now lives in Williamsburg. He said to the New Yorker this week, of the neighborhood: ““Sometimes, when I see, you know, antics on the weekend, I’d feel safer in the Vanderveer projects, where I grew up.” (more…)

12/10/14 3:42pm
death by audio vice

Apparently this was not appreciated. Photo by David Colon

Ever since the world learned that Vice was taking over most of the block that housed Death By Audio, Glasslands, 285 Kent, indiescreen and the Muse, there’s been a little bit of tension between the media company and the DIY world. That and 10,000 “Isn’t THIS ironic?” jokes. Vice has remained mostly silent in the face of people complaining about them taking over the block, but an interview on Bedford + Bowery with DBA’s Edan Wilber in which he claimed that the venue wasn’t bought out was apparently a bridge too far for Vice, who, along with DBA’s landlord told BrooklynVegan a starkly different version of events. (more…)

12/09/14 10:13am
williamsburg apple store

Probably won’t be like the Monolith, it might be. via Flickr user Justin Brown

The Williamsburg Apple Store is a concept that’s haunted gentrified Williamsburg like a spectre, with every bar, business and venue closure starting rumors anew that THIS would be the place where the Apple Store was going. Well, we can finally stop treating it like a ghost story, because the New York Post reports that an Apple Store is opening on the corner of North 3rd Street and Bedford Avenue. At least now if you break your phone at a show at Glasslands you can just stroll over and get it fixed. Oh wait. (more…)

12/04/14 3:32pm
south 4th bar

Celebrate with these goofs. via Facebook

Given how suddenly difficult it’s become to keep any fun places in Williamsburg open, we should be holding on to the places that are left as tight as we can. One of these spots? The South 4th Bar, which we love for many reasons, chief among them being that they are among the most welcoming neighborhood bars we can think of. Tonight’s an especially good night to experience South 4th’s friendly welcome, because they’re celebrating their 8th birthday with a party where you get free beer. (more…)