12/15/14 3:14pm
Don't stay sick as a dog

Don’t stay sick as a dog

No matter how many DIY medical procedures you have saved on Pinterest, you are not a doctor. Just as disappointing, your X-Acto knife and a bottle of gin won’t get you very far if you need to see one. You need insurance. If you’ve been meaning to get around to it but still haven’t, you’re in luck: Crain’s New York reports the New York Department of Heath has extended the deadline to pick a health plan to December 20. (more…)

12/15/14 3:00pm
IKEA, ahoy! (via Flickr user vauvau)

IKEA, ahoy! (via Flickr user vauvau)

You know those giant floating taxis you see on the Hudson and East River and think, “Oh you tourist schmucks! Take the land taxi, it’ll get you there faster!” Well, aside from being a bit jaded, you’re not technically wrong. But what if we told you that the New York Water Taxi is rolling out a new “point-to-point” ferry system that’ll whisk you from DUMBO to Red Hook? Yeah, that’s right…RED HOOK. One of Brooklyn’s most beloved yet incomprehensibly difficult neighborhoods to get to could be a short ferry ride away. Go on, we’re listening. (more…)

12/15/14 2:05pm
gateway ii

If you lived here, you’d be paying less rent at home by now

We broke the news last week that 2015 is going to be a banner year in “WTF, Brooklyn housing!?” with the sad reality that 60% of our hard-earned money goes straight to being able to keep a roof over our heads. So it’s always a breath of fresh air to see new, affordable housing — like this East New York building, the Gateway Elton II development, boasting $648/month for a two bedroom that Brick Underground noticed. (more…)

12/15/14 1:13pm
bay ridge

It’s just like South Slope, except not really. via Flickr user Alex Flint

What is there to even be said about the incessant need for people to declare this neighborhood or that neighborhood the new whatever beyond “Jesus, just put an icepick in my brain already”? Today’s wish for an icepick come courtesy of New York Magazine, which decided that since Sarah Jessica Parker went to Tanoreen once, Bay Ridge is the new South Slope. What does that make South Slope though? (more…)

12/15/14 12:02pm

Nets superfan Jeffrey Gamblero dies after leap from building [New York Times]
20,000 to 50,000 people marched against police brutality Saturday [Gothamist]
But a CUNY professor got arrested for assaulting two NYPD officers [Daily News]
“Yes means yes” is the new sexual consent policy on NYC college campuses [National Post]
Pulaski Bridge bike lane delayed again [Streetsblog]
Crime against pizza uses 99 cheeses [Grub Street]
Here’s all that remains of Domino [ANIMAL]
Inside a secret show at the Broad City tour [Bedford + Bowery]

midwood tire slashing

We’d usually say whatever gets you off, but this is wrong. via Flickr user chorley.paul

In the most mysterious Brooklyn crime since we all woke up to a Brooklyn Bridge with white flags on top of it, a couple in Midwood decided to spend late Saturday/early Sunday morning puncturing tires up and down Midwood. All told, the suspects who still remain on the lam, slashed tires on 70 different cars according to CBS. Police haven’t revealed the names of the suspects, but we wonder if a certain pro-cycling Twitter account will take responsibility for this one. (more…)

tea lounge

Not ready for the good, er quiet and productive, times to end. via The Tea Lounge

When the Tea Lounge announced their sudden closure last week, regulars were stunned by the news that the cavernous coffee shop would be calling it quits. Now a handful of them are committed to keeping the space open as a coffee shop and community space, starting an online petition asking the landlord to hand the lease to the space over to them so they can re-open it as a coffee shop called The Meeting House. And you thought people here only petitioned to split off from Williamsburg. (more…)

12/12/14 4:34pm
What did you learn this week? Not to do this. Illustration by Shaylyn Berlew

What did you learn this week? Not to do this. Illustration by Shaylyn Berlew

Like us in website form? Then you’ll love us on FacebookTwitterInstagram and Pinterest

- We gave you perfect advice on how to avoid screwing up at you office parties

- Beat the rest to the punch line with our pro guide on what to get the comedy nerd in your life, featuring Brokelyn alum Sue Smith (above) and four other funny people.

- Or if you know people who want books, we present you the best book gift ideas from Brooklyn’s literati.

- The East Village and the LES are the latest neighborhoods to shun SantaCon 2014.

- iTold you so: Williamsburg is getting an Apple store.

- There are many more places to work other than an Apple Store though, so don’t worry

- The Tea Lounge closed forever

- From fruitier to camp counselor, Brooklyn Tattoo owner Adam Suerte has a colorful job history.

- Who killed Hae, damn it!? We don’t know, man. But you can theorize all you want at Videology’s Serial listening parties.

Fred Armisen improvised a bunch of ridiculous New York accents and didn’t get punched in the face because he’s Fred Armisen.

- Paranoid you’ll never get laid? Let these stoner sex-ed classes help.

- Brooklyn is fast becoming the borough of broken dreams, where rent will take 60% of your income.

- But we guess you could always move to Hartford, Connecticut.

12/12/14 12:18pm
bklyn house

These strange hieroglyphics are all that future historians found remaining in Bushwick. via Facebook

Earlier this year, we let you know that Bushwick was getting a big fancy new hotel, because your guests are just too damn fancy for the Bushwick Hotel. And now, just in time for Bushwick to be the newest neighborhood for creatives to look at and say, “Huh, it sure is expensive here maybe we should move,” the hotel’s owners are calling it a “Bushwick-inspired” hotel that will draw on whatever creative energy the place has left. “Like a vampire?” you ask and we nod because hey you said it, not us. (more…)

tea lounge park slope

The coffee shop stayed busy on its final Thursday open. Photo by David Colon

Turns out that the Winter of Closings (free thinkpiece right there) will extend from out of Williamsburg into Park Slope, as the Tea Lounge suddenly announced with a message on Facebook they would be closing on December 14. No reason for the closure was given, and in a call last night to the coffee shop, a barista told us that even the employees had no idea the Tea Lounge was closing until they got to work that day. A request for comment from the Tea Lounge’s owner hasn’t been returned as of now. (more…)