09/30/14 9:58am
dustin diamond bayside the musical

See how Dustin Diamond, and therefore you, ave aged, RIGHT BEFORE YOUR EYES. via Facebook

Hey guys, are you excited about the Brokelyn High Homecoming Dance? We sure are, and one of the reasons is that our host, “Principal” Scott Rogowsky is clearly excited as well. Why else would he book Dustin Diamond for the premiere Season 6 of “Running Late With Scott Rogowsky” tonight at 8pm, if not to get into the mindset of a high school principal? Well OK, probably because also it should make for an interesting show, what with the Saved by the Bell Lifetime movie having just come out and Diamond bringing the cast of Bayside! The Musical! with him. (more…)

Get each roll blessed

Bless those rolls.

Your pet dog or cat or manatee (just bring him back to SeaWorld already) probably hasn’t been to church in a while, considering the last time you tried your dog wouldn’t stop howling and your cat used the pews as a scratching post and your manatee kept picking fights with Sister Bernadette. If you’re concerned all dogs but yours go to heaven, don’t worry, there’s still hope, because a Flatbush church will be bestowing blessings on your animal buddies for free this weekend. (more…)

09/29/14 10:23am
Tori Scott can't believe you don't remember her episodes

Tori Scott can’t believe you don’t remember her episodes

1. Singer-songwriters Steve Volkmann, Alex Alexion and Audio Romance are taking over The Way Station. (Monday)

2. Hear about one star chef’s tumultuous journey to the culinary world, by way of rehab, at the release for Jesse Schenker’s All or Nothing at powerHouse Arena. (Monday)

3. Your usual Tuesday night orgy probably doesn’t that desperately needed break for a comedy show, so check out Over the Eight’s Illuminati Orgy. (Tuesday) (more…)

09/26/14 2:04pm
the west brooklyn

Look at all that liquor, waiting for you. via Facebook

Look, the Starbucks in Williamsburg doesn’t really matter in the grand scheme of things. In due time the Illuminati will use the knowledge they glean from the neighborhood and wipe us all out anyway. In the the mean time though, we may as well have fun hanging out at local businesses that give us a reason to, like The West Brooklyn, the coffee shop/bar that hosts art nights and trivia nights and poetry readings and is a block away from where Starbucks set up shop. The West is having a 4th birthday party tonight and there’s gonna be free alcohol and merriment, and you can’t get that at Starbucks, so take that Illuminati! (more…)

09/25/14 9:41am
A mile of this. A mile.

A mile of this. A mile. via Flickr

1. We’ve found the DUMBO Arts Festival to be a better way to explore the neighborhood’s gallery’s than our original approach of knocking on their doors in the middle of the week and shouting, “Whatcha drawin’ there can I see?!” (Friday-Sunday)

2. Hear some R&B from Shanaz Dorsett at Spike Hill. (Friday)

3. The characters from your favorite shows have some pretty messed up stuff to say at Live Dubbed Sitcoms. (Friday) (more…)

Hmm...it might be time. via Flicker user James

Hmm…it might be time. via Flicker user James

You know you’re really poor when your clothes literally start falling apart while still on your back. It’s okay, we’ve all been there, and lucky for you, this weekend you can get them fixed for free at the DUMBO Arts Festival. Artist Anne Breimaier and her Mending Machine will have a booth set up through November 20, ready to sew any clothes you bring to her and as an added bonus you can call it art! (more…)

09/24/14 2:45pm
grape stomp

Sometimes the old ways are the best. via Brooklyn Plantology

You’re always talking about how handmade stuff is better than things made by machines, but for some reason, no one ever talks about things being made by feet being better. That’s probably because it’s hard to make things with your feet, but maybe it’s time to get back to the old ways and make wine by stomping grapes. You can find out just how hard that is by stomping grapes in Canarsie on Saturday. Not only is it free, but don’t forget that shit made by hand (or uh, foot) is totally in these days. (more…)

09/23/14 4:26pm
rogue taxidermy fair

Well, that’s one way to convince people you saw a two-headed lamb. via Flickr user Charlyn Wee

It’s not a party until the bedazzled piglet shows up. At least, that’s what the people throwing the Rogue Taxidermy Fair would like you to think. Admittedly, chilling with preserved animals can feel a bit off-putting, but we always thought winged monkeys were more bad-ass than scary and we’d love to see one in real life. Embrace the whimsically macabre by checking out the Rogue Taxidermy Fair on October 5 at 3pm at the Bell House (149 7th Street, Gowanus). (more…)

09/22/14 1:38pm
menu mash-up

Think of it like “Noms Against Humanity.” via Facebook

When glancing at the menu of a food truck or trendy restaurant, a few thoughts come to mind. “What brave soul first made a kimchi taco?” “Do kale chips actually belong on a waffle sandwich? I knew my drunk snacks had potential!” Indulge in your culinary creativity without setting off the fire alarm by coming out to Menu Mash-Up Game Night on Tuesday September 23 from 7pm and 10pm at Orchard (257 Columbia). (more…)

09/22/14 10:45am
Your outfit's already been planned out.

Your outfit’s already been planned out.

1. See if you can think of any topics that aren’t covered in 100 Essays I Don’t Have Time to Write. (Monday)

2. Plunge right into Dive Comedy at Freddy’s Bar. (Monday)

3. Art Talks, and boy does it (and speakers from BRIC, Soapbox Gallery and Gridspace) want to have a word with you. (Monday) (more…)