BK Top 5: The best things to do tonight, from a philosophy battle to getting wild

So someone argue that So Crates is the world's best philosopher, and hope no punches are thrown

So someone argue that So Crates is the world’s best philosopher, and hope no punches are thrown

What do you do with a problem like…Tuesday. Bet you thought there was gonna be another song thing there, but no, not today. Poor anonymous Tuesday, no one know what to do with you. Oh, I know what you can do. You can do one of these great things pulled from the Brokelyn Event Calendar, because not only are they fun any day of the week, but they beat the usual routine of Existential Dread Tuesday.

DEATH CAFE
If you are having some issues with Existential Dread Tuesday, Death Cafe is definitely the place for you to hit up. As previously gone over, British funeral planner Louise de Winter will drop in like a Mary Poppins of death to lead a discussion on the end of life issues people usually are too nervous to talk about. Those being death and dying, of course.
6pm, Morbid Anatomy Museum, 424A 3rd Avenue, Gowanus, FREE

SOCIETY FOR THE ADVANCEMENT OF SOCIAL STUDIES: BADASS PHILOSOPHERS
We’ve all been there: having drinks with some friends when a disagreement suddenly pops up about who was the most badass philosopher. At first it’s civil, but then the next thing you know, punches are thrown, fingerprints are taken, days are lost, bail is made, court dates are ignored. Avoid that horrible cycle by letting the Society for the Advancement of Social Studies do the arguing for you, with people standing up for Karl Marx, John Locke or Socrates
7pm, The Bedford, 110 Bedford Avenue, Williamsburg, FREE

MAPPING BROOKLYN: AN ARTIST’S PANEL
With the “Mapping Brooklyn” exhibit, which was first seen at BRIC and is now winding down at the Brooklyn Historical Society, people got to see artists play around with and have some fun with maps, as opposed to seeing them stay as nothing but boring geographical markers telling you where you were. Some of the artists behind the exhibit want to tell you all about their experiences working on it, so go hear them out, and then get another look at it (it runs through September 6 at BHS) and maybe you can enjoy it again with some new context.
6:30pm, Brooklyn Historical Society, 128 Pierrepoint Street, FREE

WHERE THE WILD THINGS ARE #4
Maybe you don’t want your Tuesday to be all that quiet. In that case, head to Bizarre, where a bunch of self-described wild things will be putting on a show involving music, dancing, comedy, performance art, DJing and possibly nudity. You’re even encouraged to come in costume, but that’s more of an “innocent fun” kind of costume than “weird Eyes Wide Shut orgy” costume.
8pm, BIZARRE Bushwick, 12 Jefferson Street, Bushwick, $7

SET LIST
People don’t usually describe comedy as happening “without a net” or in any other dangerous terms (other than Herb Smiley’s House of Laughs of Trapeze, which was shut down by the city). Tonight though, you can see the likes of Myq Kaplan, Ben Bailey and Kurt Metzger go up on stage and have their set determined by topics that pop up on a screen, instead of their usual prepared material. See who thrives improvising and who screws up and accidentally says something racist!
7:30pm, Union Hall, 702 Union Street, Park Slope, $15