Birthday splurge: Get your friend a singing telegram from Patrick Stickles

Stickles, explaining that he's really doing this. via Titus Andronicus store

Stickles, explaining that he’s really doing this. via Titus Andronicus store

Tired of the same old birthday gift options when shopping for your friends? Need to go beyond the usual CD or DVD or nice restaurant meal that they’re just gonna puke up after drinking? Well, we’ve got quite an offer for you: you can get Titus Andronicus’ own Patrick Stickles to show up at your house to sing the song of your choice. Yeah it’s fifty bucks, but can you really put a price on a priceless memory? No, by definition, you can’t.

The mysterious offer in the Titus Andronicus store merely reads “Patrick Stickles will come to yr home and sing to you the song of yr choice, though not ‘Theme From Cheers.'” No, not the TV show theme song, this song. We don’t know why, you’ll have to ask him. But the Titus Andronicus catalog is pretty deep as it is, and you can probably ask for songs by other bands, if that’s what you’re really into. Plus, if you wan to keep him around for awhile, you’ll notice “Tried to Quit Smoking” and “The Battle of Hampton Roads” are still in play.

The only other requirement is that you live in NYC, New Jersey or Long Island, but we guess that’s what keeps the price down, so that you don’t have to pay for airfare for Stickles to come to your house in Iowa to serenade you.