02/06/15 8:00am
brokelyn beer book

Beer would never break up with you.

Flowers and dour, sweets are beat and all those other heteronormative gifts are really heterBOREmative gifts. This Valentine’s Day, don’t disappoint your boo with some Hallmark-approved shlock (or, heavens forbid, a ticket to see Fifty Shades of Grey). Because instead, what says “I love you” more than “here are 30 free beers now let’s go get druuuuunk”?

Today is the last call to order the Brokelyn Beer Book in time for delivery before Valentine’s Day. Our middle Brooklyn (Park Slope, Cobble Hill, Red Hook, etc) edition already sold out for the year, but you can still buy one for South Brooklyn & Rockaway or our brand new Upper Brooklyn book, which contains coupons for beers at more than 30 bars in Williamsburg, Bushwick, Bed-Stuy and Greenpoint for just $30! Order one here now; they’re only available once a year! (more…)

02/05/15 6:15pm
A classic FIPS post from ye olden days.

A classic FIPS post from ye olden days.

Today an era of Brooklyn blogging came to an end: Fucked in Park Slope, which brought a poison-tongued vitriol to the borough just when it needed it most, is closing up shop. FIPS shined because it was antidote to the pall of yuppiesm that was creeping over the neighborhood. Think back to seven years ago when it first launched (nine decades in blog years): The Atlantic Yards project was still in dispute as Freddy’s dug in its heels to be the last bar evicted from the site that years later would become the Barclays Center; Union Hall was just two years old; you could still go to Southpaw for The Rub dance parties and Googamooga sounded like nonsense words uttered by someone who had just spent too long at O’Connors, squinting to watch the Mets through grainy, antennae-tuned TVs. Brooklyn was still a brand, though a simpler one.

And our stereotypes were neater back then: Williamsburg was hipster Disney World, Crown Heights was a little dicey, Cobble Hill would offer up bits of old-world Italian Brooklyn, and Park Slope was the den of progressive parenthood, where the hottest topic was which bars would accommodate those double-wide strollers while parents drank away the troubles of their coop shift. Amy Sohn was the closest we had to Lena Dunham. Now all the neighborhood stereotypes tend to run together like Frappuccino vomit onto condo windows. What do we lose now that that era is over? (more…)

01/29/15 11:45am
And that's only 12 beers! Photo by Flickr user Paul Joseph

And that’s only 12 beers! Photo by Flickr user Paul Joseph

Clear off your drinking calendars, drown your Drynuary plans and crack open some new pages in your book o’ boozy adventures because the 2015 Brokelyn Beer Books are on sale right now! As Brokelyn readers know, we curate these books every year so you get more than 30 beers at more than 30 of the best beer slinging watering holes, gastropubs, dives and craft beer bars in the borough. We’re doing two editions again for Valentine’s Day: one for Upper Brooklyn (Greenpoint, Williamsburg, Bushwick, etc.) and one for Middle Brooklyn (Park Slope, Red Hook, Crown Heights, Fort Greene, etc), and we have a few of our first ever South Brooklyn & Rockaway book. Update: the Upper and Middle Brooklyn Books are sold out and currently waitlisted. The South Brooklyn Book is still available.

How much would you pay for so much beer? $100? $200? NO! It’s just $30, only here on Brokelyn. Beer Books make a great Valentine’s Day gift, or just a present for a friend/yourself if you’re not into the whole V-Day scene.  The books usually sell out fast, so allow us to introduce our extraordinary lineup. (Pro tip: if you’re buying one for a friend, get one for yourself.):  (more…)

01/14/15 10:16am
Get on the bus. Via FB.

Get on the bus. Via FB.

Whether you grew up skiing every weekend or sitting at home and wondering why the hell kids in your school were coming in on Monday mornings with doofy tags on their jackets, there is one indisputable fact: skiing is some expensive ass shit. By time you pay for lift tickets, snow pants, a real jacket and gloves that weren’t purchased at the bodega, you’re deep in the financial winter doldrums.

That would be enough to keep most of us indoors until summer comes back. BUT … our friends at the NYC Snow Bus are back with an even better deal this year: not only are they offering cheap bus trip deals to two new mountains this year, now they’re also offering you clothing rental, so you don’t even have to buy your own jacket!  (more…)

01/05/15 12:25pm
Mmm that new bar smell. Check out Covenhoven's tribute to local beer history when you get our next Beer Book. Via FB.

Mmm that new bar smell. Check out Covenhoven’s tribute to local beer history when you get our next Beer Book. Via FB.

2014 was a year of bummer closures in Brooklyn, but leave those negative thoughts in the trash bin because it’s a whole new year. Let’s look forward to the new spots to fill our hearts with warming booze for the year to come. To wit, it’s time for the 2015 Brokelyn Beer Book! Our annual coupon book full of 30 beers at 30 bars for 30 bucks will be on sale soon (sign up for our email list to get first dibs), but first we want to hear from you about your favorite new places in the borough. Which new watering holes are watering your holes best? What saloon is getting your doubloons? What brew pub do you want to give a bro hug?

Let us know in the comments below if you want to see them in the Beer Book! We’ve already got a head start, so to whet your appetite, here’s a partial list of which bars you’ll be seeing in this year’s book (and don’t forget: you can still buy our South Brooklyn and the Rockaways book for 20 percent off, which is a deal you’re literally wasting money by not buying it right now): (more…)

12/22/14 12:01pm
Better deals than a Sam Goody going out of business sale.

Better deals than a Sam Goody going out of business sale.

Music: it’s hot this year! Sure, haters will tell you that lots of venues have closed this year and Brooklyn’s crown for being king of the music scene is as outdated as a trucker hat, but nuts to that: the borough is bursting with talent, bizarre shows and enough talent to choke Steven Tyler. So maybe you’re friends with notoriously picky music snobs, or you just don’t have Taylor Swift money to spend on gifts. Our panel of Brooklyn music pros will help guide you through the shopping season. (more…)

12/19/14 12:12pm
Photos by BibiBooth.

Photos by BibiBooth.

Last week, the hordes of Brooklyn’s office-less workers donned they now their gay American Apparel and headed to Littlefield for the fourth annual No Office Holiday Party. And woooo what a party, especially for those of us unlucky enough to have to go to an actual office the next morning. As our gift to you for this Crimbus season, we present to you these awesome keepsake photos from BibiBooth, plus lots of other party shots. Print them out, make them Christmas cards, email them to your aunt or just look at them fondly when you’re at home frustrated at trying to explain to grandma how you “work at the internet.” (Oh and to clarify, these photos are not actually NSFW. Mostly). (more…)

12/11/14 11:00am
If you come at the Kings County, you better now miss.

You come at the Kings County, you best not miss.

Years ago while working at Trader Joe’s, I saw my friend D get in a tiff with another girl, both of them native Brooklynites. After the fight, D walked over to me and said, “That girl must be from Williamsburg or something because she is HARD.”  She was of course speaking of the historical Williamsburg, once known as a rough-and-raw high-crime area, not so much the home of jokes about skinny jeans and PBR it had become. Of course, even in the years since that tiff, the fear in the neighborhood has changed: people don’t worry so much about being mugged, or being plowed under by a penny farthing, they worry that they’ve accidentally wandered into Midtown East, thanks to the chain-washing of Jay Crew, Urbo Outties, Hole Foods, Starsbuck and now an off-brand Microsoft store.

We can only guess it is this latest iteration that most terrifies Brooklyn native Michael K. Williams, who played Omar on The Wire, Albert “Chalky” White on Boardwalk Empire and now lives in Williamsburg. He said to the New Yorker this week, of the neighborhood: ““Sometimes, when I see, you know, antics on the weekend, I’d feel safer in the Vanderveer projects, where I grew up.” (more…)

12/09/14 2:37pm
Photobooth photo by Bibi Booth, returning this year!

Photobooth photo by Bibi Booth in 2012’s party, returning this year!

It’s time to rifle through your laundry pile and find some pants, freelancers: the No Office Holiday Party is this Thursday! Sure, the annual tradition, which we co-host with our buddies at the skint, is a chance for the freelancers, work-from-homers, unemployed and otherwise itinerant workers of Brooklyn to gather to feel appreciated and get drunk on holiday cheer (and cheap drinks). But even if you have a real, adult office type party, we think the odds are pretty good that our party will be more fun. Find out why, and see what else is in store at the party, in this 10-point memo below. For one, we can tell you this party definitely does not require an etiquette guide of any kind.  (more…)

12/08/14 8:00am
Mail Khimp joke goes here and here and here.

Mail Khimp joke goes here and here and here.

2014: The year podcast listening parties became a thing. Serial, the mega-hit podcast from the producers of This American Life, has legions of fans sitting at home listening to the voice of Sarah Koening as we try to figure out the big mysteries: Was Adnan’s defense boned because his attorney was so annoying? How did so many 17-year-olds have cell phones in 1999? WHAT THE CRAP ARE YOU HIDING, JAY?? Well you don’t have to sit around thinking this over by yourself any more more. Williamsburg’s Videology has started holding free listening parties every Thursday until the show ends, featuring drink specials and group discussions. Sounds better than a shrimp sale at the Crab Shack.  (more…)