08/01/14 11:48am
artspace ps109

It’s like living in an art castle but you’ll never actually live there!

Hey, remember that AWESOME affordable artist housing in Harlem that we told you about a little while back, PS 109 Artspace? Yeah, of course you do, because you thought about how fun it would be to live in a cheap apartment with a bunch of artists, but not have it be the McKibbin Lofts. Well guess what bucko? DNA Info reports that 52,999 other people had the same exact thought that you did, so your chances of getting one of those 89 units is MIGHTY slim. (more…)

08/01/14 10:00am
twin peaks saint catherine

Investigating a murder is very serious business. Also very, very weird business.

It’s August, and all of your richer friends are leaving town for vacations to here there and everywhere. Not you, you’re poor. You can still travel, sort of though. You can travel to small, simple town full of mountain air, where the locals are involved in shady casino operations and the homecoming queen is found murdered, her body wrapped in plastic. We don’t know why you’d want to go there, but you can visit the town of Twin Peaks, Washington, when The Saint Catherine (660 Washington Avenue, Prospect Heights) starts screening the eponymous show episode by episode on Sundays, starting with this Sunday, August 3. (more…)

07/31/14 4:47pm
bushwick mall

Yes, see, the black-and-white suggests themes of a simpler time, before we saw the world in color. via Wyckoff Heights

Despite our occasional appreciation of it, we here at Brokelyn are by no means art experts. Unless you’re counting Cowboy Bebop, some of us have seen every episode something like three times. Otherwise, stick us in front of an abstract painting or some experimental photograph and the best we’ll come up with is, “Yep, that’s a thing.” Still, even we were struck by the haunting new renderings of the long-dreaded Bushwick mall, delivered to the world in black-and-white instead of the usual splashes of color that developers try to show off with. What does it all mean? (more…)

07/31/14 12:00pm

Everything’s coming up Milhouse for the Mets [ESPN NY]
OK, now THIS is how you close a beloved venue [Texas Monthly]
Sheepshead Bay has some sketchy clothing bins too [Sheepshead Bites]
Here’s a peek at the new Max Fish [Bedford + Bowery]
Who owns the city’s skyline? The Port Authority says they do, oddly enough [The Wire]
What you learn from a DIY renovation effort [BrickUnderground]
Gracie Mansion is being outfitted by none other than Brooklyn’s own West Elm [Crain's]

07/31/14 10:54am
577 new lots avenue

Yeah? Then where are the horses and the saloons and the syphllis. via Curbed

As spotted by Curbed, new apartments at 577 New Lots Avenue in East New York are being advertised as “the next frontier,” which is exactly what Spike Lee just got done yelling at motherfuckers about. The worst part about this ad is that it obviously appeals to someone, maybe even someone you know and love. Beyond that, there’s not much to say, or do, about this, except stare at it until your eye starts twitching and then you eventually start laughing because hey, whatever, nothing matters.

07/31/14 10:11am

That could be you, up there on that water tower. via Facebook

Hey you, struggling grad student trying to get your MFA. Tired of plugging away at story assignments only to have some disinterested professor barely pay attention to the words you’ve written unless he wants to sleep with you? This is what happens in grad school, yes? Well, how about going around the professor and getting famous by being published in McSweeney’s, by winning their Student Short Story Contest. You could win $455, the envy of your peers, the right to say you’ve been published in the same places as Zadie Smith and Jonathan Ames, but most importantly, the envy of your peers. (more…)

07/30/14 1:01pm
2 train

No one cares for you, 2. via Wikipedia

Here’s a quick question: What’s the worst subway line in New York? The answer is usually, “Whichever one you have to ride with a self-styled Lloyd Dobler making eyes at you,” but today we have a different, more scientific answer courtesy of the Straphangers Campaign’s State of the Subways report card. That answer? The 2 train is 2014′s worst subway line in New York. Come on down, 2 train and get your crown made of dead rats, puke and various pieces of garbage! (more…)

07/30/14 12:00pm

Here comes a Prospect-Lefferts Gardens rezoning fight [Brownstoner]
Economy allegedly grows [New York Magazine]
Massachusetts grocery chain torn apart by attempt to keep treating employees as humans [Esquire]
Rikers guards indicted for smuggling drugs into jail. No drugs allowed in jail [Runnin' Scared]
The stuff people are most likely to lose on the subway [FiveThirtyEight]
Exploding 9/11 Ninja Turtles poster reconsidered [AV Club]
So what’s the deal with Mayor Tall’s sustainability plans? [Capital]

montana's trail house

No, not the morels, the morAls were hazardous. via Facebook

Bushwick man, Bushwick’s going through a bit of a rough patch. First the Department of Buildings declares the basement of the McKibbin Lofts isn’t fit for human life, and fresh on the heels of that, the Observer‘s Joshua David Stern hit the neighborhood’s Montana’s Trail House restaurant with a sawed-off double-barreled shotgun blast of righteous restaurant reviewer fury. Stein’s zero-star review didn’t just say Montana’s Trail House had bland Southern food we’ve all seen before, he ethered the restaurant’s entire concept:

Montana’s Trail House is a very bad place. Its rottenness is both inherent and cosmetic; it is culinarily insipid and morally insidious…One need not be from Appalachia to object to the fetishization of that impoverished region for the blithe consumption of faux Brooklyn frontiersmen and women

Even when the offerings are tasty—I wouldn’t spit out the root beer braised brisket with Anson Mill grits ($23) or the master fat fried potatoes ($6)—they are morally hazardous.

You might think this is where we’d ride in and defend a place in Brooklyn, but eff that, this review is howler from start to finish, so do go read it.

07/29/14 4:04pm
subway flirting

Yeah, but is she really though? via Flickr user jbc

What is the best way to interact with your fellow humans stuck on the subway with you? Climaxes of 1980s romantic comedies would suggest you get involved in their romantic affairs. Actual real life suggests you should just read a book or stare at the signs, and only interact with your fellow commuters when you need them to get the hell out of the way or to let them know they’re about to step in puke. Should you be hitting on your fellow commuters though? Dating experts that DNA Info talked to think so, to the point where they offered some tips to hit on your fellow passengers. I have a tip on how to effectively hit on your fellow passengers as well: DON’T. (more…)