09/02/14 10:51am
green-wood cemetery clown

Yeah wait…what was the deal with this feaking clown?

We here at Brokelyn are sadly aware that Summer ’14 ended in spirit yesterday, on Labor Day. This year’s summer was known for two things: the temperate weather which we’re sure we’ll pay for with a winter hellscape, and the mysteries surrounding a group of events which have captivated us all of Brooklyn, probably.

The biggest mystery Brooklyn was scratching its head over this summer was the pair of white flags sitting atop the Brooklyn Bridge, put there in place of the American flags that adorned the top of one of the most beautiful structures in America. We’re not fans of freelance decoration of the Brooklyn Bridge in general here, but we have to admit, there was something sort of interesting about those flags. Who put them there, and why? Random jokes on Twitter claiming responsibility for the flags were also met with an outsized reaction by the authorities who were clearly frustrated with the lack of information they were able to unearth themselves. We had a bonafide caper on our hands.

Then we found out some German artists did it, and after we got over our relief that there wasn’t some sinister reason for the flags being put there, we settled in with the disappointing fact that it was some silly art thing. Anyway, we’re not getting burned by a mystery’s uninteresting resolution again. We already saw the last season of LOST. But hey, that was only one of the many mysteries swirling around our fair borough. We still have others, and we want answers. Interesting answers. (more…)

freddy's bar

Bring some meat, it’s welcome here. via Facebook

Look, this Monday’s Labor Day, and we get it; for most people, this means that it’s time to regret that you once again called it the “Summer of YOUR NAME” and didn’t actually go skydiving, learn to play an instrument, or get anywhere near sculpting that beach body. It’s also the time of year when you’re likely to walk into your local pharmacy and see decorations for Halloween and beyond for sale in the seasonal section which goddamnit, already, really? That’s okay, because Freddy’s (627 5th Avenue, South Slope) is here to help, with a free Labor Day BBQ. (more…)

08/25/14 3:01pm
From Gowanus to your living room. Usually people say that about sludge, so consider yourself lucky. via Boundless Brooklyn

From Gowanus to your living room. Usually people say that about sludge, so consider yourself lucky. via Boundless Brooklyn

You remember the Kentile Floors sign, right? F and G train riders can’t appreciate it for seconds at a time anymore, along with the occasional bump in their Instagram likes that it entailed, but now you can enjoy the feels it gave you right in your living room, whenever you want. Boundless Brooklyn, the small company behind the cardboard model water tower and other water tower-related ephemera, will sell you a model version of the Kentile Floors sign according to Brooklyn Paper, if you insist on owning one of those. (more…)

08/15/14 2:13pm
banksy

This one seems like it could be good for you.

If you’ve just moved into a new apartment, congratulations! We hope it doesn’t have bed bugs. Also, you might want to do a little bit of decorating. Finally get rid of your Reservoir Dogs poster and that Ikea art you made a huge mistake buying, and check out Gilt’s Banksy sale for a quick way to spruce up your new pad. (more…)
monro pub

Just imagine there’s an audience there, and then imagine them in their underwear if you’re nervous. Photo by Dominic Perri, via Facebook

Are you the resident cutup at parties? Do you have ideas for great stories kicking around in that noggin of yours, aching to be freed? Have you lost the attention of all your friends and are just desperate for an audience, any audience, because you have things to SAY damnit, and people have to hear those things?

You’re in luck because, starting tonight, The Monro Pub (481 5th Ave., South Slope) is starting a storytelling series, and they’re looking for a few good (or at least brave) yarn-spinners to come on by and share their stories with their fellow booze hounds. (more…)

08/11/14 1:47pm
bicyclists' ball

You don’t HAVE to show up like this, but it’d be kind of bad ass. via Flickr user Hugger Industries

If you were too cool to go to your high school prom, congratulations on sticking to your story, but also, here’s your chance to make it all right by heading to the first-ever Bicyclists’ Ball (and Pedestrian Prom), hosted by Transportation Alternatives, the organization that supports cycling, walking, and public transportation in our fair city. (more…)

08/04/14 2:59pm
You know, professional headshots, like a model.

You know, professional headshots, like a model.

It’s August now, which means you’re swiftly getting over those humid days, the hope you had in your baseball team is fading into oblivion (damn you, Mets), and you’re realizing that the Summer of You, the time you’ve enjoyed celebrating your relationship with your couch, is coming to an end and you better actually get yourself a job. If you were thinking of dusting off that neglected LinkedIn profile of yours, you’re in luck. If you just wanted to get a photo that’s actually from your good side out there in your continuing quest to get a date online, you’re also in luck. Either way, consider updating that 3-year-old profile photo with a free professional headshot courtesy of Mesh. (more…)

sunset park

Go up Sunset Park’s hill a bit and play ball with all the locals, while they still exist. Photo by Dave Rosado

Following through on his campaign promise to do so, Mayor de Blasio is ready to funnel $100 million into some heavy duty development in Sunset Park, planned for the Brooklyn Army Terminal, Industry City and Liberty View Plaza which includes high-budget sequels to DUMBO and the Chelsea Market.

Affectionately known at one point as Gunset Park by those who grew up there (like me), and slapped by those who lived in neighboring sections of Brooklyn with the derogatory moniker Gunset Park, it’s is still a place where you can get some of New York’s best bahn mi and tacos, and where you can enjoy an amazing view of Manhattan from the highest point in Brooklyn, in the actual park itself. Sunset Park is, for now, still known as an affordable place that’s just barely resisted the fast moving gentrification of Murray Hill East, Park Slope and countless other neighborhoods. Now though? It’s on the fast track.

In case you haven’t visited Sunset Park before, might I suggest you do so now, while it’s still in its twilight days? This way, when the transformation to Sunset Park 2.0 is complete and nobody will be able to afford to live there anymore, you can at least say that you saw it before the change over to yet another place people write stupid hacky lazy hipster-related jokes about. Make sure to hit up some of these old local favorites now, before they’re bulldozed to make room for luxury housing. (more…)

07/25/14 12:54pm
portside newyork heavy metal sale

You can probably figure out what to do with this thing. via PortSide NewYork

Are you a prospective restaurateur struggling to think of a theme for your future eatery? Stocking up for an elaborate production of your one-person show, “If I Were a Pirate”? Perhaps you’re just looking for a way to decorate your apartment like a ghost ship so you can dub it “the hull,” kind of creeping out all those who visit from now on, you weirdo? No matter what your goal, there’ll be some deals waiting for you at PortSide NewYork’s “Heavy Metal” sale at Pier 11 in Red Hook this Sunday, according to DNAInfo, where you’ll find all the marine gear, and none of the scurvy. (more…)

07/23/14 7:00am
brooklyn greenway initiative epic ride

It’s gonna be…pretty good. via Facebook

This Sunday, Sunday, SUNDAY, get your epic exercise on with the Brooklyn Greenway Initiative‘s 6th annual Epic Ride, a great alternative for anybody who missed out on registering for the always popular Five Boro Bike Tour, or those who laughed maniacally at the $90 price tag to participate, which sounds like a weird thing to do but okay. Starting bright and early at 8am, the 40-mile bike ride will take you from Greenpoint to Rockaway Beach, providing a great chance to see a whole lot of Brooklyn (and a tiny bit of Queens) within a few hours. (more…)