The victor and her spoils at Gimme Coffee.

Society generally has it that once you outgrow the children’s menu at restaurants, you become ineligible for free stuff on your birthday. And when you become part of the world of student loans, unemployment checks, and doing your taxes, those gratis clown-faced birthday sundaes from Friendly’s aren’t to be taken for granted. Now that you’re old enough to appreciate them, is it fair that you don’t get them anymore?

On March 13, I turned 23. And I awoke with the intention to not spend a dime all day. While, yes, accepting gifts from friends and loved ones, my primary aim was to find out how many businesses/strangers would be willing to oblige me. (more…)

This guy again?

What we have to look forward to at this Sunday’s 84th annual Academy Awards on ABC at 7pm: skits of our host Billy Crystal plopped into War Horse and Moneyball, shots of Martin Scorsese raising his downy eyebrows and pretending to care about whatever is going on and, perhaps, an appearance by the Uggie, the best supporting canine of The Artist. Puppies aside, the Oscars are much more fun if you have a team to root for. So if you’ve been too broke to get to the movies for a while but you can still swing a ticket, why not treat yourself to a viewing? Also, if you’re not up to paying the full weekend prices, there’s no shame in waiting for the Tuesday $7 matinees. Here’s where you can still catch some of the nominees on Netflix and in theaters. (more…)

Bay Ridge? More like NAY Ridge!

Attention enraged peoples of Bay Ridge, Gravesend and Bensonhurst — and we know there are a lot of you, judging by your comments on this post: You now have a public forum to express your distress at Oxygen’s latest stereotype-laden, girls behaving badly program Brooklyn 11223. As highlighted by The Bensonhurst Bean, Councilman Vincent Gentile and a group of “unnamed prominent Bay Ridge women” will host “a press conference in defense of our neighborhood” tomorrow. The protestors will meet outside of the Beyond Dance Studio 8717 Third Ave. at 11am to address their grievances with they say is the show’s crude and reductive portrayal of Bay Ridge residents, grievance including that the zip code isn’t even in Bay Ridge. Well guys, now you know how New Jersey feels.

Oof.

The Oxygen Network’s latest attempt to steal MTV’s thunder turns its lens on our own backyard. The Post reports that Bay Ridge, a neighborhood you may know as near where everyone goes bat-shit with their Christmas lights, is slated to get its own “Jersey Shore-esque Reality Show” on March 26. And rather than smelling like a tub of jolly Ron-Ron juice, it will most likely reek of whipped-cream flavored vodka and hatred. The series, titled Brooklyn 11223 (which is definitely not Bay Ridge, as commenters point out below), will focus on a “once tight-knit group of girls from the Brooklyn ’hood [who] are still at each other’s throats over an alleged heinous act of betrayal years ago,” according to the Post. Since the people responsible for The Bad Girl’s Club are at the helm of Brooklyn 11223, we can expect nothing less than a gaggle of thick-accented girls in bodycon dresses calling each other “fake bitches” and “followers.”  (more…)

Jason and his fridge-sex-nymph. But seriously, can't he just have his pants back already??

Get ready for a new crop of teenagers to covet your lifestyle, Brokelynites. After a whole mess of promotional buzz and Jersey Shore interruptions, MTV’s new stab at a scripted series I Just Want My Pants Back premiered last Thursday. The Williamsburg/Greenpoint-based series follows a pack of post-grads with Diablo Cody-style rapport who soothe the crappiness of being broke and hating their jobs with substances and sex. Sounds familiar enough, and yes, sex is a great (and arguably free) form of recreation, but who is having this much of it? I thought everyone else living in Brooklyn was as lonely and involuntarily celibate as I am …  (more…)